How's Your Day?

"How's your day?" asks the teller at the bank oh so casually. She was busy processing my transaction. She hadn't really glanced up or she probably would have noticed the teary look on my face. Or maybe she would have thought I always looked like that. She doesn't know me. It was my first time at that branch. Even a teller at my own "home" branch probably wouldn't have noticed. I pride (?) myself on thinking I hide my feelings so well. HA! I'm discovering I am only fooling myself. I have a horrible poker face. Emotions on sleeve. Check.

"How's your day?" SUCH a loaded question. Is he/she just making pleasant conversation? (Probably) Does the person asking REALLY want to know? (At a bank? Probably not) Do you answer truthfully? (Crappy thanks. And you?) Just say fine to get it out of the way and get the business you need done? (Just take my money and move on. No need to be pleasant!) Answer back almost parrot-like, "how's YOUR day?" (tempting.....)

Quite honestly, today was NOT the greatest day. I honestly answered after I hesitated a bit...."I've had better" to say fine would have been lying....mostly to myself.

I have had better. I have also had worse. I am not usually so honest with a stranger. I am not even usually that honest with myself! My mind repeats....fine, fine, fine. My heart goes....not so much, not so much.

When the not so fine, I've had better days are few and far between, I feel like I at least have a grip on life. When those days are coming closer and closer together, like they have been lately? Oh, the grip is not quite so tight. The smile is not quite so forth-coming. The tears are much closer to the surface and sometimes even spill out.

However? I am beginning to realize that the way of handling those days is much more important than how I answer the question.

There will always be something that can turn even the best day quickly into what seems like frustration overdrive.

Having a less than stellar day? Try some of the following:

Acknowledge - If it sucks? Say so. Even if it is only admitting it to yourself.

Better - There WILL be better day(s). It may not be today or the next day, but take your better whenever and however you can....even if it comes in increments and not the whole day.

Grateful - Find something, ANYTHING to be grateful for!

Laugh - Find a way to stretch those smile muscles.

Strength - When you feel weak, borrow somebody else's strength until you feel yours coming back.

Ice Cream - When all else fails, do what you gotta do. Get sprinkles. Everything's better with sprinkles.

**Nudges - Pay attention to the nudges. If you feel like you are supposed to take a little extra time to do some praying, devotions, etc? DO IT. I'm finding out this is God's way of providing that extra strength I'll need....before I know I need it.

**That nudge this AM made this an "I've had better" day instead of a curl up in a fetal position in bed day when I made it home.

Romans 8:37-39 (NIV) No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

FREE (thought) Trash Removal

I'm online paying my trash bill. I'm thinking. I pay to have my physical trash removed weekly. Well, the weeks I remember to get the bin out by the road in time anyway.

I'm feeling a bit blah. Dumpy, if you will. I'm letting the darkness outside creep inside. If I'm not careful, depression will start to try and take over. I'm getting better at realizing it. Most days. When I pay enough attention, before it gets too much of a grip. When I remember that it's OK, preferable even, to TAKE the happy pills I have on hand. When I remember, I don't have to battle darkness on my own. When I acknowledge, it is more of a battle than I like to admit.

Feelings, emotions, thoughts that can get dark easily. They become the mind trash that needs to be dumped. I don't keep physical trash around. Why should I keep mental trash around? Why should you?

We don't even need to pay to have it removed. Well, unless you count therapy! ;) 

Wouldn't it be N.I.C.E. to work on removing some of that mental trash?

N - Notice!
When those thoughts start invading, pay attention. Don't let them get a foothold and lead you down the path of self destruction.

I - Don't Ignore! It may feel easier to just stay in bed at least temporarily. However, if it is becoming preferable to stay in bed rather than participate in life? Get some help. Call a dr. Phone a friend. Reaching out may be the last thing you FEEL like doing, but remember feelings are not truth.

C - Celebrate!
Something. Anything. Find a reason to inject some joy in your day. Turn the radio on. Have a family dance party. Dance by yourself. Find a reason to celebrate that you are here for this moment. BE in THIS moment.

E - Encourage!
Find something encouraging to read or look at or enjoy. Encourage someone else. You never know how telling your story may help someone else on their journey. Others have walked this path, but no one has taken YOUR path. Don't walk alone.

Little lights shine brightest in dark places. Find a way to bring a bit of light into each day. Even if you have to borrow it temporarily from someone else's candle. Then when you're feeling better? Share your light with somebody that needs a spark.

Genesis 1:3-4 (NIV) And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.
 

Philippians 4:8 (NIV) Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Psalm 100:4-5 (NIV) Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Necklaces

Necklaces, lovely to look at. Necklaces can be a piece of art. Necklaces can enhance our wardrobe. As long as they are put away properly, necklaces can be a great source of beauty.

BUT

Maybe one gets in a hurry. Instead of hanging the necklaces nicely in a jewelry box, the necklaces get jumbled up, knotted and, in general, causing a big problem. Especially when the ONE necklace you REALLY want to wear is right in the middle of the jumbled up knot! Of course, by the time one adds the final piece of jewelry before leaving the house, time has already flown by and the necklace is grabbed almost as an afterthought. The jumbled knot is discovered. Time continues to tick. Try to undo the knots? Pick another necklace? Go necklaceless? ;(

Emotions and thoughts, lovely to feel (sometimes), can be expressed through art, can enhance our outlook on life. As long as handled properly, emotions and thoughts can bring a great source of fulfillment.

BUT

Maybe one gets a little bit too much of life thrown at them. Instead of handling emotions and thoughts as they come up, they get pushed down or aside, making us feel knotted up inside and, in general, causing a big problem. Especially when that ONE event you REALLY DON'T want to deal with is right in the middle of the jumbled up knot! Of course, by the time one realizes the emotions and thoughts are heading downhill, time has already flown by and the skills we have learned to deal with them are remembered almost as an afterthought. The jumbled feelings are becoming overwhelming. Time continues to tick. Try to handle on our own? Get some help? Go emotionless? :(

Kind of a silly comparison, but sometimes what life feels like sometimes, doesn't it? The necklaces are just a visual of what our heads and hearts can feel like sometimes. A way to give a picture to the feelings. When thought of like this, maybe we can even feel like we can have a bit of control over what feels like will control us. When we take a bit of time hanging up necklaces (self-care), there is a much less chance of the necklaces ending up all knotted up and in a jumbled mess (feeling like our emotions and thoughts are controlling us!)

Find what works best for you. Use what works. Have a plan in place that when you feel overwhelmed, you can know what to do without having to add more stress. Phone, text or e-mail a friend. Write in a journal. Pray. Read the Bible. Talk to God. Listen for answers.

We don't have to wait for our lives to feel like a jumbled up, knotted mess. We can start using some of those things ahead of time to strengthen us for when we can't control the knots.

Wear your necklaces, thoughts and emotions. DON'T let them wear you out.They are meant to be shared. YOU have something worth sharing. Keep that jewelry box in your head and heart knot-free. Hugs, my friends.

30 Proverbs 14:30 (MSG) 
A sound mind makes for a robust body, but runaway emotions corrode the bones.

Isaiah 55:8 (NIV)

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.

Psalm 139:2 (NIV) You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.

Philippians 4:8 (NIV) Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.