Life stays too busy, but what else is new? Truly what makes it busy is sometimes just things to keep me busy so I don't have to deal with other "stuff" and life avoiding.
Our mom had eye surgery yesterday. I went last night to help until my sister could get there. She is much better with medical stuff than I am. I can crunch numbers like nobody's business and help with general "care", but get me near needles and medical mumbo jumbo? EEK! We all have our talents and areas of gifts. :)
After surgery, mom needed more assistance than normal doing everyday things she can normally do pretty well on her own. One eye was covered up. She was supposed to lay on her back as much as possible. This is difficult enough as it is. Life is challenging enough without extra challenges! Understandably, she felt unsteady as she made her way through the day.
Last night, I found myself saying numerous times, "you're OK". As a parent, I have said this to our kids many times. I have personally dealt with anxiety and had close family members that do too. I've been told this many times too. I remember not always feeling OK even though I was being reassured I should feel OK.
I thought I was being reassuring. Later though, I got to thinking it was also kind of condescending.
She didn't FEEL OK. I've been telling, not listening. I didn't take that extra few seconds to find out WHY she/our kids/other people/I might not actually feel OK.
Looking back, I think I meant to say "Trust me. I know you can't see right now. You don't trust yourself. Trust me. I will be your eyes. I will help get you to where you need to go."
It is extremely difficult to be this vulnerable. We are sometimes. We don't want to ADMIT it though! Even if others can see why we might need some reassurance and assistance.
Looking at the bigger picture? I think God has been whispering this to my soul lately. I haven't been doing the best at listening. I find things to reassure myself I'm OK. God tells me I don't need to FEEL OK. I need to TRUST Him!
How about you? Feeling a little less than OK? TRUST.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.